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Modern Ferret News Mailing List Issue #35
http://www.ferretnews.com
December 8, 2002
by Mary R. Shefferman and Eric Shefferman
contact: mary modernferret.com
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Hi
Well we've had our first big snow of the season -
which means it's really time to start Christmas
shopping!
Check out this picture of our wooden bear outside!
http://www.modernferretblog.com/mary/
Believe it or not, we've already finished our
shopping! We have to... it's the only way to make
sure we'll have time to ship all your orders during
the next week or so!
Personally, I don't love the crowds while shopping
at this time of year (although being a late-night
person, I do enjoy going to the shopping mall at
10PM when they're usually rather empty).
In this issue we're re-running an editorial of mine
from the current issue of Modern Ferret magazine.
As you'll see, I am a real fan of online shopping -
speaking of which, here's some ferrety online
shopping suggestions:
We have a whole bunch of products available at our
http://www.ferrettradingpost.com
store, including the brand new Ferret Faces 2003 Calendar
and the new book _500 Things My Ferret Told Me_. Plus
we have many old favorites, including our book _The Wit
and Wisdom of the Modern Ferrets_, the Security Cube for
ferrets, and our Monster Pack of Modern Ferret magazine
back issues.
As I said, we've gotten all of our shopping done already
so that we can fill your orders quickly!
At our Ferret Designs site we have ferrety holiday
greeting cards and other special holiday products. See:
http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/store.aspx?s=ferretdesigns.33785
The best-selling items this season have been our line
of "Ask Me About My Grandferrets" products. Everything
from T-shirts to mugs to picture frames for the proud
ferret grandparent. See all the great gift ideas here:
http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/store.aspx?s=ferretdesigns.33784
And of course there's all the old favorites: #1 Ferret Mom,
Love Me Love My Ferret, World's Greatest Ferret Dad, etc.
http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/store.aspx?s=ferretdesigns.33783
Wishing you all a wonderful December!
- Eric
----- The Modern Ferret News -----
>>> In this issue: <<<
==> The People You Meet In Shopping Lines
by Eric Shefferman
==> There's Still Time For Shopping!
==> Update on Modern Ferret Things
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Or a ferret mug, tote bag, or mousepad.
Or a clock, frosted mug, or flying disk!
We now have greeting cards, too!
Check the web site for sales & specials!
http://www.cafeshops.com/ferretdesigns
Shopping at Ferret Designs helps us be able to
offer this newsletter for free! Shop today!
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==> The People You Meet In Shopping Lines
by Eric Shefferman
I'm not one to try to engage my fellow shoppers in
conversation while waiting in line. I tend to keep
to myself. Somehow Mary often ends up in conversations
with people, and they seem to always eventually come to
ferrets. That's when I almost always wind up cringing.
For some reason, mentioning you have ferrets seems to
just bring out the worst in people. I don't know why -
so I just try to avoid the conversations altogether.
Here are some of the things that people say that really
annoy me - things I'm sure we've all heard before.
Things that somehow Mary has the wit and tact to deal
with, but I just don't.
* I couldn't possibly take a ferret. *
I don't know who asked these people to take one of our
ferrets. We certainly didn't offer any of our ferrets
to them. Somehow people act like having ferrets is some
sort of problem similar to having roaches and that your
only purpose in going out in public is to dump a ferret
on them.
* My dog/cat/iguana would kill a ferret. *
I don't know how or why people make such a statement
with so much pride. Last year a department store clerk
bragged about how a ferret couldn't survive a fight
against his pet iguana. This is just so wrong on so
many levels I don't know where to begin. I've never
heard a department store clerk brag that his son could
beat up a customer's daughter, people just know that
that's the wrong kind of thing to brag about. So why
brag that your pet can kill my pet?
I don't know if a lot of people just say this
automatically to act as some sort of defense to protect
them from us trying to give them one of our beloved
family members. But as I stated above, it's not like
we're offering to give away our ferrets, so they really
shouldn't have to stop us.
* Don't they have rabies? *
No animals spontaneously get rabies, they can only get
rabies from a rabid animal. Animals that do have rabies
die. So you couldn't really keep rabid animals around
the house for all that long. And why would anyone
assume that you would or would want to?
* Don't they bite? *
Well, for one thing: ferrets are a lot friendlier
than the people you meet at malls. This stupid
question usually follows a mention of how we curl up
with the ferrets to watch TV or how we play on the
floor with them. I don't know what these people are
thinking. I've known people who keep piranha fish
(which do bite), but they don't curl up with them or
play with them.
* You shouldn't keep wild animals! Aren't they an
endangered species? *
What a horrible misfortune that the American
black-footed ferret is called a black-footed ferret
instead of a black-footed polecat. Pet ferrets are
not wild black-footed ferrets in a way similar to the
way miniature poodles are not wild wolves. Let's
not even get into how horrible it is when someone
brags about how good they are because they "released
a ferret back into the wild."
* My (insert some relative here) had one and it stunk! *
Well, far be it for me (as someone who has had ferrets
since 1992 and who has been writing about pet ferret
care since 1994) to suggest that your relative might
not have been taking very good care of his or her
ferret. That would be rude, wouldn't it?
* Do you breed them? *
This comes up a lot - especially if the number of
ferrets we own has been mentioned. Somehow people
assume that if you have more than one of an animal,
then you must just be an unlucky breeder who doesn't
know how to get rid of them fast enough. It's never
believable that you just happen to like the
companionship of ferrets (despite the fact that
ferrets are never caught at shopping malls making
rude comments to people).
That's just for starters! I just don't know what
to say to people who make comments like these, so I
try to avoid anything that might start a conversation.
It's going to take years of effort from people like
Mary who can talk to these people about ferrets and
dispel their rumors and misconceptions without
wanting to bite their heads off. Your mileage may
vary, but for me, online shopping has a lot of
advantages!
Have a happy holiday season, and good luck with
whatever conversations you get into with your fellow
shoppers.
:)
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If you've been reading this newsletter and would
like to see what Mary and Eric do in a real printed
magazine, you can go to our online store and order
a single copy.
http://modernferretstore.com/24/cat24.htm
Modern Ferret Magazine issue #33 features:
- A *huge* interview with best-selling author
Richard Bach (_Jonathan Livingston Seagull_
and now his new books _The Ferret Chronicles_)
- Is it a Boy or a Girl? How to sex a ferret
- Teeth, Claws, and Eyeballs: Why are my ferret's
teeth so long? by Bob Church
- Dear Gabby's tips for new ferret parents
- The Bones of a ferret: Bacula
- Ferrety Nursery Rhymes
- plus ferret cartoons, funny stories, and more!
*and* a very special Ferret Faces Pin-Up Centerfold!
You can also order a subscription, back issues,
and other Modern Ferret products from the site.
http://modernferretstore.com
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==> There's Still Time For Shopping!
Help support this newsletter, get your holiday
shopping done early, and save money at the same time!
There's still time to order these items now to
give as gifts (or just keep for yourself!).
** The Ferret Faces 2003 Calendar and Address Book **
http://ferrettradingpost.com/caladbook.html
This is the adorable new calendar and address book
filled with photos of sweet little ferret faces.
We're really proud of this, so give it a look! Sharp
close-up photography of ferret faces!
You can see all 12 faces from this year's calendar by
going here:
http://ferretfaces.com/january2003.html
** 500 Things My Ferret Told Me **
http://ferrettradingpost.com/500ferret.html
This fun book gives you 500 enjoyable ferrety quotes
all wrapped up in a nifty little square book. We're
so sure that you'll want to keep a copy for yourself
as well as give the book as a gift that we're offering
it with a Buy 2 Get One Free special!
** The Monster Pack of Modern Ferret Back Issues **
http://ferrettradingpost.com/take25pack.html
We've renamed the Take 25 Pack and we've even thrown
in a bonus mug!
"I enjoyed every page of the Modern Ferret Take
25 Pack. This was an excellent deal for me. The
informative articles on ferret health, the humorous
stories, and the sweet photos of other people's
fuzzies is awesome. I just wish that I had the
other back issues that are out of stock! I keep
them in a basket so I can refer to them when one
of my ferts has a health or behavioral issue."
--Joyce Huff and the 9 li'l "devils"
(Sara, Kooter, Fuzz, Tootsie, Fuji, Nikki, Sasha,
Tweeters, and Spanky), Pennsylvania
This Holiday Season, get yourself and your ferret-
loving friends a gift they'll enjoy and that will
help them help their ferrets live happier, healthier
lives -- the Modern Ferret Monster Pack!
** The Wit and Wisdom of the Modern Ferrets **
http://ferrettradingpost.com/witandwisofm.html
Compiled from the columns written by our ferrets
during the first 5 years of publishing Modern Ferret
Magazine, this book has the kind of writing that
got Modern Ferret chosen as one of the 12 Best
Magazines in the Magazine Business!
Ferret care tips written by ferrets -- what could
be more educational while being enjoyable to read?
Remember:
Place your orders now so we can ship them with
plenty of time for you to receive them!
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==> Update on Modern Ferret Things
If you've been reading the newsletter for while,
you know that we just moved at the end of October.
Our main living area is still a disorderly mess
so the only place our ferrets can play is in our
bedroom.
We've never had a ferret-safe bedroom before and
it sure is a lot of fun! Gabrielle has decided that
the best place to sleep is right in the middle of
our bed! It is so cute!
We can sit on the bed and play with the ferrets
and watch TV and when Gabby gets tired she just
lies down next to us! Yay!
Have a very happy December and a ferrety new year!
- Mary and Eric and the ferrets
Trixie, Koosh, and Gabrielle
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-- Holiday Shopping
Start your shopping now!
Remember that by shopping at
http://www.FerretDesigns.com
and at
http://www.FerretTradingPost.com
you help support this newsletter and keep it free.
That's it for this issue!
Stay tuned! More great stuff is on the way!
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Please let your ferret friends know about this
newsletter and encourage them to read it.
Shopping at these websites to helps support this
newsletter and keep it free.
http://www.ferretdesigns.com
http://www.ferrettradingpost.com
You can provide feedback about this issue by sending email to:
marymodernferret.com
Y
Disclaimer:
http://ferretnews.com/disclaimer.html
The shortened version of the disclaimer is:
If your ferret is ill or you think your ferret
is ill, bring your ferret to a ferret
knowledgeable veterinarian.
Copyright 2002 Modern Ferret magazine.
All rights reserved.
http://www.modernferret.com
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